Recommended Grief Resources

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By Edith Ankersmit Kemp and Jerrold Kemp

The book offers inspirational as well as practical advice for finding, attracting, and maintaining a loving partnership in later life. It’s based on a series of interviews with married or committed couples age 55 and older.

2002, Celestial Arts, Toronto, ISBN# 1-58761-156-2

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By David Baldacci

After the death of his devoted wife, a father struggles to keep his family (three children) together and in the process learns to love again.

2011

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By Tom Bekkers, MSW, APSW and Gerald J. Schaefer

There are distinct differences in the manners in which men and women grieve. Men in particular keep grief to themselves, maintain emotional control, and refrain from asking for help. Divided into three parts, "Picking up the Pieces," "Healing from Within," and "Giving Back to Others," The Widower's Tool Box offers men who have lost their partners a guide to helping identify and resolve the issues overwhelming them and to repairing their lives and moving forward. The areas covered include basic training in unfamiliar household systems, creating new traditions, using the prayer connection, finding new friendships, making a scrapbook, and facing the issue of unresolved emotions. Ultimately, this book channels grief into constructive tasks that enable the bereaved man to recreate a life that can be fulfilling once again.

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2010, New Horizon's Press, Far Hills NJ

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By George A. Bonanno

What the new science of bereavement tells us about life after loss.

2009, Basic Books

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By Robert N. Butler and Myrna I. Lewis

Has a good chapter on finding new relationships in addition to chapters on sexual activities (and challenges) for those over 60.

2002, 1976, Ballentine Books Publishing, ISBN# 0-345-44211-3

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By Scott Campbell and Dr. Phyllis Silverman

In "Widower: When Men are Left Alone", a journalist and a social worker explore the grief process as men experience it. The book contains the oral histories of twenty men, ranging in age from 30 to 94, who have lost their wives to a range of causes including cancer, alcohol, murder, and suicide. Taken together, the stories guide the reader through the journey of widowhood, from the raw despair of the early weeks to the resolved perspective thirteen years later, offered by the only true authority on the subject - the men who have survived it.

1996, Prentice Hall, New York

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By Fred Colby

The greatest fears I had during my grieving was that I was losing control, going crazy, and might make decisions that would harm me, my family, and my friends. This included suicidal thoughts which scared the hell out of me. I was desperate to find answers. Quickly, I found those answers would be hard to find, as resources for widowers are minimal and often of dubious value. In Widower to Widower, I've compiled the most vital information I could find on the widower experience into one book, so the reader does not have to search as hard as I had to do. I include many critical issues not addressed in other publications. This can be raw and brutal at times, much like the grieving process itself. Widower to Widower is woven around blogs I wrote during and after my wife's passing. This storytelling element allows the reader to be in the moment with me during the grieving experience, and to see that their own experience is not uncommon. As I've learned from hundreds of fellow widowers, mine was not a unique journey but was similar, in many respects, to their journey as well. I am the expert only on my own experience. Each widower's experience is unique, but there are common threads and shared experiences. We must each find our own path while learning what we can from each other. This second edition includes 60 additional pages of research, insights, resources, and a men's grief group guide. Reader testimonies are included in the first two pages of this 2nd edition.

2021, ISBN# 0692891242

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By Mark R. Colgan

2017, ISBN# 0692854126

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By Chirstopher Cooper

From Hell to Happiness: How to Heal When Your Loved One is Terminal, gives a detailed sharing of his family’s journey through his late wife’s metastatic breast cancer, how he coped, helped his children cope, and took care of his wife while coming to terms with his greatest fear – a future without his soul mate. This book aims at helping younger caregivers and widowers.

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2018

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By Kenneth J. Doka and T. Martin

1999, Routledge

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By Kenneth J. Doka and Davidson Joyce D.

1998, Routledge

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By Lon Elmer

Old, but a classic.

1987, Signal Elm Press, Seattle, Washington, ISBN# 0-944844-47-2

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By Linda Feinberg

Support guide for young widows and widowers, advice and shared experiences.

1994, New Horizon Press

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By Thomas R. Golden, LCSW

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HG Publishing

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By Thomas R. Golden, LCSW

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By Thomas R. Golden, LCSW and James E. Miller

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By Donald Hall

This book of poems speaks to grief as a poet lamenting the death of a poet, and as a husband mourning the death of his wife.

1998, Houghton Mifflin Co, Boston, Massachusetts, ISBN# 0-395-88408

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By Abel Keogh

Dating a Widower is your 101 guide to having a relationship with a man who’s starting over. It also contains over a dozen real life stories from women who have gone down the same road you’re traveling. It’s the perfect book to help you decide if the man you’re seeing is ready for a new relationship—and whether or not dating a widower is right for you.

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By Abel Keogh

Men and women grieve differently. Though both feel the pain and sorrow that come with losing a spouse, widowers start dating much sooner than widows—usually within the first year of their wife’s passing. While there’s nothing wrong with dating again that quickly, widowers often get into relationships before they’re emotionally ready to take that step. That causes problems for them and the women they are dating. This book looks at the success stories and learning experiences of Joe Biden, Thomas Edison, Peirce Brosnan, and Paul McCartney.

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By Abel Keogh

If you’re dating or married to a widower, you’ve encountered relationship issues that other couples just don’t have to deal with. Whether it’s the comments on his late wife’s Facebook page or the tattoo commemorating the love of his life, there are some situations that are unique to widower relationships. Drawing on over a decade of experience helping women in relationships with widowers, Abel Keogh tackles the most common, day-to-day widower relationship challenges so you can gracefully navigate and overcome them.

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By Allen Klein

Work through the depression of grief and loss with resilience: Losing a loved one is never easy. Allen Klein knows how it feels―just like you, he's lost many loved ones in his life. Inspired by Klein's experience with the loss of his wife, Embracing Life after Loss will help you to recover from grief and loss―just like Klein did.

2019, Mango , ISBN# 978-1642500066

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By Herb Knoll

With Deborah Carr Ph.D. and Robert L. Frick.

2017, ISBN# 1541344065

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By Rachel Kodanaz

2013, Fulcrum Publishing

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By Elizabeth Levang, Ph.D.

1998, Fairview Press

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By CS Lewis

A sensitive and powerful story of the author’s grief experience after the death of his wife. Lewis reflects on the fundamental issues of life, death and faith in the midst of loss. This book acknowledges how one can lose all sense of meaning in the universe and eventually regain his or her bearings.

1961, The Seabury Press, New York

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By Gloria Lintermans and Marilyn Stolzman

This is a collection of 12 stories from widows and widowers of all ages, from all walks of life and situations, sharing their new loving relationships.

2006, Champion press, Wisconsin, ISBN# 1932783512

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By The National Widowers’ Organization

While there is no one perfect way to start a men’s bereavement group, nor a pat format for conducting group sessions on an ongoing basis, there are some basics that will get you up and running. Here are a few ideas based on guidelines from the American & N.J. Self Help Clearinghouses, the National Widowers’ Organization and other sources, adapted for the men-only grief group experience.

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By Patrick W. Page

Pat Page's wife died after almost fifty years of marriage. Now he sits and talks with men about everything from dating to cooking to anger, tears and even S-E-X. Essential for all men. "For a while, I was worried about going crazy but my old cronies, upon whom I have leaned a lot, assured me that I was already crazy and not to give that any more thought."

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By Dr. Ronald G. Petrie

Into the Cave: When Men Grieve. For more information, call 503-771-4341.

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By Marvin Petsel

Grieving widowers are told all the wrong things: Pull yourself together. Be strong. Don't cry. If your wife has died and you have heard these words, or ones like them, this book is for you. Written in a conversational way by someone who has suffered the pain of grief, it includes topics that provide both comfort and understanding of: a. Ways to deal with men's mourning and grief. b. Stories from other grieving widowers. c. Ideas to help overcome loneliness and sleeplessness. d. Methods to work through the pain and begin a new chapter in your life. When his wife died, the author didn't know how to cope with the grief and mourning.

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2014, Embers4growth Publishing

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By Therese A. Rando, Ph.D., BCETS, BCBT

Whether the death was sudden or expected, from accident, illness, suicide, homicide, or natural causes, Dr. Rando will help you learn to: • Understand and resolve your grief. • Talk to children about death. • Resolve unfinished business. • Take care of yourself. • Accept the help and support of others. • Get through holidays and other difficult times of the year. • Plan funerals and personal bereavement rituals.

1991, Bantam Books, New York

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By Donald L. Rosenstein, M.D. and Justin M. Yopp, Ph.D.

On a mid-October evening, a group of fathers gathered around a conference table and met each other for the first time. None of the men had ever thought of himself a "support group kind of guy" and each felt entirely out of place. In fact, nothing about their lives felt normal anymore.
The Group: Seven Widowed Fathers Reimagine Life chronicles the challenges and triumphs of seven men whose wives died from cancer and were left to raise their young children entirely on their own. Brought together by tragedy, the fathers - Neill, Dan, Bruce, Karl, Joe, Steve, and Russ - forged an uncommon bond. Over time, group meetings evolved into a forum for reinvention and transformed the men in unexpected ways. Through the fathers' poignant interactions, The Group illustrates that while some wounds never fully heal, each of us has the potential to construct a new and meaningful future.
Rosenstein and Yopp, co-leaders of the support group, weave together the fathers' stories with contemporary research on grief and adaptation. The Group traces a compelling journey of healing and personal discovery that no book has ever captured before. The men's touching efforts to care for their families, grieve for their wives, and reimagine their futures will inspire anyone who has suffered a major loss.

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2018, Oxford University Press, ISBN# 0190649569

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By John F. Roskopf and Jill Schoeneman-Parker, Psy. D.

If you or someone you care about has experienced the death of a spouse, you'll find this slim but powerful book to be an invaluable companion through the soul-searing, sometimes bewildering aftermath of loss. Written by someone who has been through deep waters himself, I Carry Your Heart offers an unvarnished but ultimately transformative view into the process of grief, as lived and told by a keen observer of his own struggles and story.

2020, BookBaby, ISBN# 978-1098322885

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By Mike Russell

This book will give readers who have lost someone to death a chance to reflect on their own stories while giving hope that there is indeed a way out of the darkness that humans have created around the subject of death and grief. The writings emerge from the deepest crevices created when death occurs and wonderfully unfold into life with the help of a deep and eternal love. Although written from the often-lost world of a man’s perspective, this book is for every adult who is grieving the loss of a family member or other loved one.

2017, T Michael Healing Arts, ISBN# 9780989659383

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By Rosalind Sedacca and Amy Sherman

A Woman’s Guide to Avoiding Dating Disasters. At midlife, your purpose shifts from the superficial to the meaningful, from external gratification to internal satisfaction and purpose. Many boomer women find themselves ready to start dating again, but hesitate due to fear or other concerns. Will anyone find me desirable? Should I even try? Is it really possible to find that meaningful relationship at this stage of my life? This book will address the key points we feel you need to know before you begin a romantic relationship. 99 Things Women Wish They Knew Before Dating After 40, 50, & YES, 60! will empower you so that you can avoid the pitfalls and mistakes many women face and increase the likelihood of developing a healthy, mutually satisfactory bond with your significant other.

ISBN# 978-0-9866629-4-2

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By March Silbert and Harold Spielman

Divorced? Widowed? Over 50? You’re not alone. The number of mature men who are "Suddenly Solo," by choice or not, has grown remarkably in the past few years. No matter what the underlying circumstances, many Suddenly Solos find themselves searching for real-life coping skills as they enter into this new (and yes, exciting!) single phase of their lives. Suddenly Solo has real-world answers to questions about dating, housekeeping, finances, sex (by the way, there are more single women out there then there are single men!) and so many other issues that will likely be on your mind. Told in a light-hearted way (but backed by extensive, original research), Suddenly Solo is a welcome traveling companion for the mature divorced or widowed man as he transitions into his new world.

2012, Ideation Consulting

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By Jerry Sittser

Written by a man whose mother, wife, and young daughter were killed in motor vehicle accident. “The experience of loss does not have to be the defining moment of our lives. Instead, the defining moment can be our response to the loss.”

1995, 2004, Zondervan Publishing, Grand Rapids, Michigan, ISBN# 0-310-25895-2

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By Jan Warner

Grief Day by Day offers supportive readings and exercises to help you move through life after loss, one day at a time. Grief is complex. It is ever changing and may come to us differently on any given day. Grief Day by Day offers reflections and practices that address the day-to-day feelings that accompany the ever changing process of grief. In Grief Day by Day, Jan Warner draws on her own extensive experience and the experiences of the 2 million followers on her Grief Speaks Out Facebook page to offer hope in its most practical form. This book does not look to offer a solution to grief. Rather, it provides supportive, useful guidance to help you create a life in which peace, and even gratitude, can coexist with your grief. Inside the pages of Grief Day by Day you’ll find: 365 Daily Reflections that include quotes, meditations, and other musings on grief Weekly Themes that capture common feelings and experiences such as: Loneliness, Things Left Unsaid, Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms, Guilt, and Intimacy 52 Healing Exercises that help you process your feelings at the end of each week and develop skills for coping with grief as it arises There is no “right way” to grieve, and there is no right way to use this book. Whether you follow it page by page, or select that which seems most relevant to you at the moment, how you use this book is less important than why you are using it. You’re using this book because you have chosen to honor your experience, to make a home for your grief, and to find a new way of living on the bridge between loss and life.

2018, Althea Press, ISBN# 9781641521314

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By Terrell L Whitener

My wife battled health issues for many years, but we adjusted, and we had a plan. We had adjusted the rhythm of our lives. The key word was "we," and the six words "I am sorry to inform you" were all gone. I remember never feeling more alone during those initial moments than at any time in my life. I will never forget my first words upon hearing that my wife had died. Those words were "Oh, Robyn." What may have seemed like a weird reaction to some was part of the irrational thoughts that would become very familiar to me. "Why didn't you tell me that you were dying? We could tell each other anything!"

2018, Authorhouse, ISBN# 9781546233749

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By Robert Wolley

Deals with the emotional, financial, physical, and other relevant issues facing seniors when considering a new, intimate relationship. Topics covered include: What is love? Should one fall in love again – at an advanced age? What will the children say? What rewards are possible? What happens when love fails? How does one express, and receive, love? Do seniors love, and make love differently?

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