Challenges of cooking for one

From April 9, 2019

In widow groups, I often hear people comment on how hard it is to adjust to “eating alone” and/or “cooking for one”.

When this came up last week with a client, he and I decided we should brainstorm together and see what kind of options might be out there for the mealtime dilemma. We were quite pleased with the list we came up with, both the quantity and the quality of our solutions.

So, I thought I’d share it with other widowers out there.

• Invite friends over for dinner. My client mentioned he had started experimenting with preparing different cuisines. He decided to prepare a 3-course Indonesian meal and experiment on his family members. His wife had traditionally done most of the cooking prior to her death, and he’s taken on learning how to cook as part of his healing process. He thinks he’s going to branch out and experiment on friends next time.
• Talk to other widowed people in your area about setting up meals together once a week. One way to do this would be to change homes each week. The host could choose and prepare the entrée. Everyone else could bring the remaining dishes and beverages.
• Invite a professional chef to your home for cooking lessons for yourself and your friends.
• Arrange for a group of friends to come to your home and prepare multiple meals at the same time. Each person is responsible for the ingredients for their dish. People can make anything of their choosing. For example, a large pot of chili, several pans of quick breads, fresh-chopped salsa. The finished products can then be evenly divided between each person. Everyone will leave with days of meal options (this idea really helps with the “cooking for one person” issue).
• Sign up for a cooking class through a local college or restaurant and attend with friends.
• Arrange for a baking session with friends or family. Bake cookies, pies, and cupcakes and then take some of them to local homeless shelters (and of course, take some of them home with you).

You’ve probably noticed that these ideas all include other people.

I believe it’s important for us to be proactive about having regular interactions with current and potential friends. It keeps us from being as lonely, keeps us active, and helps us make new friends. In addition, it’s a great way to possibly find love again if that’s what you are interested in.  

I’m sure there are many more cooking/food options. I’d love to hear your ideas. And if you’re struggling with other parts of your widow journey, please reach out and I’ll be happy to see what answers I might have.